Article
Part 2: The Downward Spiral
 

I was in an accident in June 2006 which damaged some muscles and joints. My thighs, neck, and ankles had much swelling and discomfort. Day after day, I would limp around barely able to walk. As the days went on, I became more sedentary because of the pain and discomfort.

As a result of the swelling and pain, I would not exercise so I gained weight. The weight caused my joints to hurt causing me to become more sedentary causing even more weight gain and discomfort.

I really came to have great compassion for the senior citizens with arthritis and my great Aunt who used a walker and was hurting but would not go to physical therapy. I now understood. When the physical therapist said Ms. Wright we will start with 3 minutes on the bicycle and I mounted the bike, I could not lift my leg by myself to put my foot on the pedal and the three minutes left me winded and in great pain.

Finally, I received a prescription for rehabilitation. That first day was really, really difficult in rehabilitation. I was hurting that night and had to take an anti-inflammatory. But after about two weeks I was so happy that I went. I started to feel so much better yet I had to make myself go everyday five days a week for one month. Then I moved on to water therapy. That was fun after I released some of my fears of being in the pool and I started to lose a few pounds. One day I almost felt like my old self. The downward spiral had halted and I was spiraling up.

Then I thought about the two months that I sat after the accident without rehabilitation in pain. I wondered if had I started rehab earlier, would  I indeed have have been feeling better a lot sooner. I had to take action to turn things around and that action was so, so hard at first.

Folks it can be like this in the love life of married people sometimes. Quite frankly for women, the less sex you have, generally the less sex you want and hence the downward spiral. If you are out of practice the act can cause you discomfort and not be enjoyable. Believe it or not the vagina is a muscle. It is tissue with nerve endings and and it needs to be used to get the best performance.

When husbands and wives have not been intimate in a long time it can be a vicious cycle of anger, feelings of rejection, moodiness and distance. Then the person doing the initiating may stop trying to initiate being together because the pain of rejection is too great. Next one person may resort to pornography, other relationships or just not coming home at all. Your spouse may even become out of balance in other areas like overeating for comfort.

A man who has obsessed over money problems, or his job can get into a routine of no sex and finding very little time for his wife. Let me tell you, if you and your spouse are in the middle of financial problems you need to make love almost every day. It is the best stress reliever you can have.

Neglecting a wife has been listed as one of the greatest precursors to affairs. That means neglecting  to talk to her or finding time to be with her. It doesn’t mean you didn’t take her to lavish restaurants and grand vacations. It means you could not even find time to just to lay on the couch together in front of the fireplace and watch Andy Griffith re-runs. When you lie down at night, you don’t even touch. You find yourselves not laughing out loud together anymore. Neglect means you guys are roommates and you will catch up with each other “whenever.”

Make a conscious decision to halt the downward spiral. Its really easy. As a matter of fact the first step is simply admitting you are in one.

About the Author: If you’re ready for a riveting, real, and no-holds-barred exposition of what it means to be a loving wife, then J.T. Wright’s When One Flesh Worships (paperback, 978-1-60266-865-2) is ready to deliver. The book reignites the matrimonial fire for wives through an expressive treatise of God’s intended plan for marital intimacy between a husband and wife.

When One Flesh Worships Special Report:
New Beginnings for the Sexless Marriage - Six Part Series
Part 2: The Downward Spiral
http://www.WhenOneFleshWorships.com
Copyright © 2007 J. T. Wright